Wednesday, November 25, 2009
So I think to myself and I think I did OK this past year...but what am I thankful for?
Well here it goes
I am thankful for my husband, he is supportive and believes in me more than i believe in myself. He truly is my biggest fan!
I'm thankful for Rebekah...she is a strong leader. She loves her sisters to the end, always protecting them at all times. Shes tough, very intelligent, beautiful on the inside as well as the out. She is a crafty kid that can come up with some wonderful poems.
I'm thankful for Erykah-Marie. She is sensitive to others needs. She fights for whats right and makes sure everyone is treated fairly. This little girl is a walking brain..I swear she is Einstein reincarnated! She is very musically talented and always tries new things even though it may be scary she faces her fears and goes head first.
I'm thankful for my Monikah. She is very sensitive girl. She loves to sing, she loves to laugh. She loves to draw and craft. She makes sure that her daddy is taken care of.
I'm thankful for my sweet Jesykah. She is so caring...and always makes sure that MOM is taken care of. She loves unconditionally. She always puts others first, makes sure they are taken care of. She wears her heart on her sleeve. She is the light of the family.
I'm thankful that I have fairly good health. I could be worse off. I'm thankful for the work the Lord gives us so that we can provide for our children. We have a roof over our heads, warm beds to sleep in, plenty of food to keep us happy and all the little extras that we enjoy.
I'm thankful for my faith. I'm glad that GOD gives me the heart to keep believing in him no matter what comes my way. I am so thankful for my family. My mom and dad are my world. My brothers, no matter what, they are the best people I know. I'm thankful for all my friends that Ive had for many years, and all the new friends I continue to make. Each one adds a wonderful light to my life. Each one is a special piece in my life's puzzle.
I just so thankful for everyone and everything that GOD has blessed me with. I'm thankful for the talents and the "brain" he has blessed me with. I am just so thankful for all of it...the blue skies, the birds that sing in the morning and at night. I'm thankful for the breezes during hot summer days and the cool winds in winter. I'm thankful for rainy days and the sounds of the rain on my roof and my back porch. I'm thankful for the wonderful paintings my girls make that hang on my dinning room wall. The wonderful love, light and innocence that they portrait of a young child's mind. It reminds me of the great responsibility I have to mold these children to be great citizens and stewards for the human population of the WORLD.
Thank you GOD for everything and everyone in my life. All of you have a BLESSED Thanksgiving. Remember to love your family right now...you may not have tomorrow to tell them how much they mean to you. Make each moment count, each breath you take mean something. GOD BLESS!
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Suggested start to get your FIRST mammography is now 50...not 40 like before.
Giving yourself self breast exams at home is now a BIG NO NO!
Ok well I have a bone to pick. Honestly...50? I mean I know of women who have had breast cancer at 20!!! One girl I heard she was 16 YEARS OLD!!! I mean seriously. I know they checked out over 60,000 women in all ages, all ways of diagnosis, but still.
I heard, on the Today show, that women under 50 have dense breasts. Dense breasts are hard to read...they are a lot of work. LAZIES!!! Get off your fat asses and do something else. It is also recommended that women with dense breasts get an MRI. Just because you don't want to do the work, does not mean you put a woman's life at risk. So they are supposed to wait till they are 50 IF THEY EVEN GET TO BE 50 because your to lazy to read 'DENSE BREAST MAMOGRAPHIES!?'
As for the self breast exams...there are rules to that. Check yourself AFTER your period...not before. I check myself 2 days after mine. Why? Well because when your ovulating, hormones cause our breast to do funny things. I know my breasts (TMI HERE) feel the same way the felt when I was breastfeeding my girls. The feeling of my milk coming down. That tingle sensations...yeah...thats what I feel. I have found some lumps on my breasts but they are the ducts. Its the Hormones...so now I wait till AFTER my period and yes I did read this, and hear it, that is its best to do this right after you are done with your menstruation.
They said self checking causes a lot of anxiety, a lot of "undue" stress. However, I like to be better safe than sorry. Heck, check your armpits too. They are also part of your breast area...don't you know? I one time found a lump in my armpit...I was freaking out. I went to my OBGYN...I told him about it...it was a blocked sweat gland. YES I did feel a little embarrassed but you know what, not so much. Id rather sound like a neurotic hypochondriac than later on finding out that it was something I needed to take seriously. By the way just so you know...I am a semi-hypochondriac...LOL
either way...there is a lot of controversy over the new guidelines and rightfully so. So many women have saved their own lives by checking themselves. DONT STOP LADIES...CONTINUE YOUR SELF CHECK EXAMS...DEMAN MAMOGRAMS!!! Esp if you have a history of CANCER in your family! Even women with no history of breast cancer in their family have been surprised by this enemy...young vibrant women in their 20's, 30's and 40's. Their lives have been saved because of mammograms and self check exams. So don't buy the hype. Continue to do what your doing. We need to look out for ourselves. No one looks out for a woman, only we can take that step to make sure we are here for our future...our children and our grandchildren. We need to be our own boss and make our docs listen to us. Because even though we nag...we are usually right...hardly ever EVER wrong.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
He said he needed to provide for his family, he needed to take care of his new family. He hates asking for help and so he went this way. I was scared. I had never left home, I had never lived away from my family. Heck my dad was the typical "Hispanic" father that believes a young woman is NOT TO LIVE outside of DADS protection. A man can use her and abuse her. She doesn't know better! Really I was his only daughter and I think he had issues with letting me go, but that's another blog.
A lot of people have a hard time letting their children go. I might, have a hard time. A lot more people have a HARDER time letting their child go to the military...I might NOT. I think its a noble thing to do...but my girls will have their degrees before they go. Over my dead body will they be enlisted, they will go commissioned officers if they join the military! The military was a scary thing for me, again for above reasons. I learned a lot about myself. We had so many good memories, we did have some not so good memories. For example, Marty missed Erykahs 1st bday and the birth of Jesykah. All in all the milestones missed wasn't all that bad. We got to travle the world, live abroad and the girls have a vast knowledge of other cultures, other foods, other languages. We didn't have to worry when Erykah had RSV 3 times then diagnosed with ASTHMA. I didn't worry when she got Kawasaki's Disease. I didn't have to worry when Rebekah was born early and so was Jesykah. Or when Jesykah stopped breathing at 2 months and had to be rushed to the hospital...I DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY! Everything was covered, everything was taken care of.
It is a good life, don't bash it. It takes care of families, yes its scary, but it can be a life long lesson for your kids. You have to be open minded, be willing to travel to countries you do not know the language and just IMMERSE yourself in it. I loved it, I hope we do go back to the Army. I still have lots of countries to visit...LONDON, PARIS, CHINA AND MORE!
The military is a great place...a very great place to be. You just have to be strong and open minded.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
She is my 2nd daughters God Mother, well they are her God parents. We never really ever got together because well at first Marty was an Army man. We moved a lot, we came home not to many times and when we did it was a "drive by visit". I have, since I was 23, known that I should not take my family for granted. My best friend passed away 2 months after she turned 23. I then realized, that we are all here one minute and the next we are gone. I suffered a lot with her death, to the point that I almost lost it. My faith was very much shaken, I couldn't understand WHY God took her away. She was a healthy young woman, not previous complications due to illness, nothing that I KNOW of. She fell into a coma one day 2 months later she passed away. However my family didn't extend to more than my kids, my husband, my parents and my brothers. I was wrong.
She (my best friend) must have finished what she came here to do, that's all I can think of. However her death gave me lessons that I still use to this day, and sometimes Marty either gets mad at me over or makes fun of me. I always say 'GOD WILLING' cause in the end it is Gods will weather or not we stay or go right now. I always hug my girls and tell them I love them. I don't make things more than what they seem. I don't like making mountains outa molehills. I realize that my life is a gift. Everyday is a gift, every hour, every minute and second...they are all gifts and we either waste them or put them to good use. I try not to worry about things that I cant change, I try not to worry to much about nothing because in the end they are still going to be there.
Those of you who know me know I'm catholic, and those who don't know me personally and just through some social network should now my faith in my religion is strong. Yes there are times that I get upset and I get mad at GOD and I say to him "YOU KNOW WHAT I DON'T TRUST YOU ANYMORE!" then later on he shows me I should and I pray and say I'm sorry. I'm like a child who wants things her way sometimes. See we are children of GOD, no matter how old or how young we are all children of GOD. We act with him how our children act with us. We throw tantrums when we don't get our way, we feel betrayed when people or situations get taken away. We blame HIM for things WE as a human race have ruined. Just like our children throw a tantrum when they don't get that candy, those jeans, that phone. They feel like we don't understand them when we don't let our kids go to that party where all the WHO'S WHO of the school will be. They blame us when something good happens yet they are punished for their actions.
I know my life is a gift, I know my children are loans. I know my husband, be that he is my best friend, can be here one minute and not here tomorrow. I try not to take my days for granted. I am not afraid of death, but I am afraid of what will happen after. I'm afraid my youngest daughter will not remember me. I'm afraid, how my husband will react. I'm afraid my children will withdraw from life and loose their faith. I and weaving a net for them. I try to make them understand that because things don't go the way we planned doesn't mean GOD doesn't love you or that it was wrong. Life can hand you LOTS AND LOTS of lemons. I know, I'm one of those people that have tons of LEMONS. I'm constantly sick. Seems to me like when I take 2 steps forwards, I end up being pushed back 5 steps more!
Still, I wonder about my cousins and his wife and his children. The family is on edge. I haven't visited him or his wife, I'm afraid to, since shes started her round of chemo. I don't want to take anything that could harm her. I mean I think I have allergies, but for all I know I have some super cold bug that could cause her more harm. I do hope that she takes time to make memories with her kids. I hope she is leaving them letters. I know that's what I do. Id make letters to each and everyone of my girls. Id leave them videos of myself for them.
Now that I think about it, this is another great lesson for me. I don't know when I will pass on. I SHOULD be making letters to my girls. I may go tomorrow, or even tonight. We all should do that. Today at church, we found out that a WHOLE FAMILY was killed while traveling. Life is so precious. Shakespeare said "Life is like a candle. It can either burn itself down and die naturally or it can be snuffed out with a passing wind." There was a story my mom told me...and its true. She knew this woman who's grandmother had passed on. The grandmother left a very LARGE sum amount of money to her son, the woman's father. The father told my moms friend that he was going to spend all that money traveling and not to expect anything because he was going to spend it all. Well he never got the money...a few short months later, the man passed away. He never got to spend that money he so greedily yearned to do.
I don't write this to preach. I'm really writing this because I need to let my feelings out in a way. I am upset. I do not understand why she is going through this but I do know its not GOD creating this. We did this to ourselves. All the pollutants we breath, drink and eat. Unfortunately it is us that is causing these illnesses in such young people. So how come GOD doesn't come and fix it? Well, why don't you fix every mistake your child does? Same reason why GOD doesn't, what would we learn from it? NOTHING. If you went and fixed everything your child did wrong and your child didn't get punished, he/she wouldn't learn anything from it and would continue doing what is wrong. We can not blame GOD for our misdoings. We can not blame GOD for the things we put in the air, food and water.
I do hope that she knows its not GOD punishing her. I hope she knows its not GOD allowing this to happen to her. I do hope she knows that GOD is there to walk her through the hard times. I hope that she doesn't loose faith no matter WHAT the outcome is. I know its hard to trust someone else you cant see with the fate of your life...but that's why its called faith. We sometimes don't get what WE want, we may not understand why things happen and one day you will, but at this moment we don't. I don't know if she will live or die. I don't know. I hope she lives. I want her to live, not for me, but for her husband and her children. I know id be beside myself worrying about my children's future and the things I will get to miss. I would worry about the things my girls will miss not having a mother. I know my husband will have problems doing certain things, but i do have faith in him. Its more of my fear of not being here for my girls, not seeing them grow. Graduating from college, getting married, HAVING A SLEW OF KIDS!!! cause yes, i want A LOT OF GRAND KIDS!!! and all these things all my fears I see it being played out in my cousins life. It shakes me to my core. I pray for her that GOD leaves her here. I know in the end it is his will not ours. He has a plan. I know what I want for her. Ill I have is my faith that GOD will do what is right and that all I have to do is trust and pray.
end of my vent.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
So where am I going with this? OK so my oldest, Rebekah, is 12. She just turned 12. However shes getting "ready" for the teen years already. I call it "THE PRACTICE RUN!" For me, what gets to me is, the lack of attention she gives us. I tell her to do something and I expect her to do it. However she seems to think that she can take her time with it. The "oh as long as it gets done sometime today its OK " attitude...I don't like that. She drags, she has no concept of time. TIME STANDS STILL FOR THE LITTLE MISS! PHHTTBBB!!! YEAH RIGHT! OK so that's been my mini drama here in our home. Even Marty is getting fed up with her attitude.
New drama unfolds this morning:
Marty: REBEKAH ITS 7:20 WHY ARNT YOU DRESSED!?
Rebekah: I cant find anything to wear
in comes Erykah...
Rebekah: THAT'S WHY I CANT FIND MY PANTS!! ERYKAH IS WEARING THEM...TAKE THEM OFF NOW EJ AND GIVE ME MY PANTS!
Marty: WHOA...you should have gotten your cloths ready last night bekah, you cant just tell EJ to take of her pants (Rebekah starts to argue here ) when we are getting ready to leave!
Rebekah: (while Marty is finishing his sentence ) DAD I LEND THEM TO HER FOR ONE DAY! NOT THE ENTIRE WEEK!!
Marty: Check your tone little girl, you don't yell at me.
Rebekah: (in a much quieter voice and tears streaming down her face) But those are my pants dad. I only have 2 pairs of pants.
Marty: Where are you other pants?
Rebekah: I DON'T KNOW?! (she realized what she did because Marty looked at her sternly and she looked down) I don't know dad?
Marty: Find them and use them?
Rebekah storms out upset and crying....she did find her khaki brown pants, but she was still upset about the other pants. Our deal at our house...GET YOUR CLOTHS READY THE NIGHT BEFORE. My little ones do that all the time. Rebekah used to do it but now she just ignores us and does her own thing. Then when things go wrong, she blames everyone else! She sees her sister wearing her pants all week long and now she wants them back? UUGGHHH!!
I really don't want to deal with "MOM SHES WEARING MY SHIRT!" thing. I buy cloths and I remind them they are to SHARE the cloths. I tell my mom and my MIL that when they buy cloths for them, to make sure they don't get them EACH their own...they need to learn to share. It seems like as the days go, Rebekah seems to act out a bit. Shes not bad, she does not talk back...she knows better. We do allow our girls more freedom to tell us what they feel but it has to be don't with respect and tact. It is something that FOR ME I couldn't do with my parents. As I grew up you did what you were told. If you said anything about it in a negative way, oh you got spanked.
I know Rebekah is trying to find "herself" she is a independent young lady, yet at the same time she comes to me when she needs comfort. She is not afraid to hug me and cuddle with me in front of her friends. When her friends are telling their mothers "Stop mom your embarrassing me!" She tells me "you don't embarrass me". I feel good that she is comfortable. So its not really your typical pushing away of the parents thing, its more of sibling rivalry. I never went through it...so I'm not sure how I'm gonna handle it. Marty dealt with BOY stuff...so hes not much help either. Oh whats a mother to do. Oh well, just take it in day by day.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
I grew up with a WOMAN: my mom, who probably didn't HAVE to work, but did. She is that woman that would not accept the title "HOUSE WIFE". She was a career woman ALL of her life. She started working at the age of 14. One because she wanted to help out her family. My grandparents were immigrants. When they came to the U.S. my mother was about 3 yrs old. My aunt and uncle are much older. They were a poor farming family. What prompted my mom to work at the age of 14, I don't know. She and her best friends just wanted to earn money, I suppose. They tried their hand at picking crops at a local ranch. She said that by noon, they wanted out! They hitched a ride back to town and her best friends dad, a prominent man in our city at that time got upset that they were back home and not working. They were scolded like little pups with their tails between their legs, well that's how my mom tells the story. In two shakes of a lambs tail, that man acquired my mother and her best friend a job as secretaries. That's how my mothers career started. She stayed with that job for a very long time, I know at least until she married my dad. I came along then my brothers, but I do not know what my mom did or if she worked during those times. I do remember being young and seeing my mother come home from work. She always smelled good, that was because she worked at retail stores. My mom was a fashionista, so she surrounded herself with cloths all the time. Not a week went by where my mom didn't come home with brand new cloths for my brothers and I. Its one of the perks in working in retail..I should know, I worked in retail when I was a teen too! When I was in Middle school, my mother had a stint working in the Hospital. However my mother wears her heart on her sleeve. Gee, I wonder where I get it from? She said she couldn't go into another room of a dying old person and basically tell them "Before you die we need to make sure your bills are paid here." So she quit! Not long after she landed herself a job with the school district and there she has been for nearly 20 years.
It is my mothers belief that a woman NEEDS TO WORK. That woman shouldn't settle into domestic duties. She is one of those "I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR!" type people. If she has an opinion she will tell you her opinion, even if you don't want to hear it. My mother expected me to get some POWER HOUSE degree and have some kind of GREAT career. Well at least become a teacher. To her EVERY DEGREE leads to a teaching job. I don't know I guess its this area...either become a teacher, a nurse or a doctor.
Certainly I didn't expect to be a house wife either. Honestly...I was studying to become an elementary teacher. However I knew I wanted a family soon and I wanted to start young. For that I needed a man!!! hahahaha. I was going to college, I was studying to be a teacher. Someone told me "Before you continue become a substitute and make sure you like this career. Its not for everyone." That person must have seen something in me to tell me that. Certainly I took that advice and I'm glad I did. I DIDN'T LIKE THE TEACHING JOB! I hated it. I had two years under my belt of college and now I didn't know what I was going to do with my life. 2 yrs later, I married my husband, then came Bekah and a military life. So I never did finish my degree.
So the topics just to catch up Do you think that its fair across the board when it comes to duties between men and women at home and at work? Like childcare, chores, cooking and stuff like that. Do you think a WOMAN has to work or do you think that she should have a choice?
Most of the women I know...are housewives like me. I certainly didn't choose to be a stay at home mom. When Rebekah was born, there were a lot of reports of day cares not taking care of babies, babies dying, babies having horrible infections from unchanged diapers and those horrific video tapes of babysitters physically abusing babies and toddlers. If you know Marty then you know he is just a tad over protective of his babies. He doesn't trust easy and when he saw that, he said to me "YOU ARE STAYING HOME AND TAKING CARE OF REBEKAH!" It wasn't something that we talked about, he just decided...he just didn't think ANYONE could take care of our kids better than us. I mean certainly I did work here and there. Mostly I volunteered with the Army Family Readiness Groups. However from the get go, it was set that I am to be a mother who raises the kids. I took care of all the household chores. Marty really didn't have to lift a finger, but he did help. He would cook, did the dishes and other things.
I knew families where the woman DID have a career or a job or whatever you want to call it. Some had to; some wanted to. That was the army..the army provided us a more comfortable life style. We are NOT in the army anymore and yes money has been tight. Marty and I have talked about me going back to work. He will tell me "I think you need to find a job" and Ill say "Yes, I know, Ive already put in some applications." Then something happens. One of the girls get sick. If you didn't know I have an asthmatic and a migraine sufferer. Things get forgotten by the girls and yes, even by Marty. Marty then freaks out and he says "Priscilla, you can find a job if you want to but you don't have to" its his way of saying "STAY AT HOME WE NEED YOU!" LOL. See we don't have the luxury my mom had when she was raising my brothers and I. She had her mom to help. My grandma didn't work, she took care of us when my parents were'nt at home. My grandparents picked us up after school. We were never home alone. If we were sick my mom didn't have to worry, grandma would care for us. My mother in law had the same luxury. My husbands granny (on both sides) took care of him and his brother. Yes I call it a luxury. I don't have that. My mom works, my MIL works too. My kids get sick mom gets called, I pick them up. Rebekahs migraines can last a WEEK! Shoot if I had a job the boss would have called me and said "Mrs. Resendez forget about coming back to work" Then there is the dreaded after school time? I mean my elementary school kids have the option of staying in the after school program, but my near teen daughter! Heck just the other day my BIL was here visiting us and we were talking about this very thing. If no one was here at home, who KNOWS what would be going on. I mean I know my daughter...but her friends my take advantage that there is nobody at home and try to come here with their boyfriends...I don't want that and certainly Marty's eyes popped out wide at the idea of that happening. Again he reaffirmed that it is a good idea that I'm at home!
So in the end...Are you a stay at home mom? Do you want to become one? Is it possible or does your husband not 'LET YOU'. Yes I did say that. I say that cause I know several women where the husband will not LET the woman stay at home with the kids. One of those couples...are divorced now, because of that issue. She wanted to raise the kids, not someone else, he said NO GO TO WORK! Now they are divorced. I understand that there are times or certain situations where you NEED two incomes, but if you can do with one, then I think its ok for the woman to raise the kids instead, I mean if that's what she wants. I think there should be some kind of a compromise there. If you want to stay at home, also understand that the lifestyle you are living right now is no longer going to be there with one income. Also understand that your household chores tend to double. Its not only household stuff, but errands. People start to expect that because you are not working you have a lot of time. Normally its true, but honestly, like take me for example, I have to take care of things for 5 other people. My girls are very active girls..cheering, choir, football, so they need school things and activity stuff all the time. I'm running up and down all day long most days. I take them to the doctor, when they get sick. Cook lunch for my husband when he comes home for lunch, and so much more!
So let me know...I know its a long blog...but its very good to talk about it. How is your family dynamics? Moms...what do you expect for you girls if you have daughters. What do you expect from the girls you son marries? For me..I want my girls to get degrees. I want them to have something just in case they need to bring in an income for their families when they start their families. I mean I will certainly be there to help them. If they have careers, Ill be here to take care of my grandchildren. If they want to be SAHM...I want them to be SAHM. However, I want them to have that degree cause like our times right now...it will help them bring in more income if they need it.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
If they are still here tomorrow, I will take pics, yes, I will snap away, i will go to the park and just click away. They are so beautiful. It almost makes living in this boring city ok.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Then just about 10 minutes after this was taken, she was doing a cheer with all of her team. She looked so pretty and her pompoms in hand. All of a sudden she looks down, her smile comes off and she is frowning. I told Marty "Somethings wrong" He said "What do you mean?" I said "Rebekah isn't looking good, she looks like shes feeling sick" He looked at her and he said "Go check whats wrong" I did, I went down and she looked at me and she said "Mom, I'm gonna get a migraine" So since Monday night she has been in pain. Tuesday was the worst day. Our house looked like a cave, all dark and quiet. Wednesday was a little better, but she still had pain here and there. There was one point where she went to her room and curled up to cry. Those are the times where I feel like I want to jump out of my skin because I cant help her. I cant make her pain go away. She is taking adult strength Advil and STILL the pains comes through.
It is much more hard to deal with a child's migraines than with your child having asthma. I know the triggers for Erykah. They are usually the same for every asthma sufferer across the board. Migraines are another beast of its own kind! Every migraine sufferer has their own triggers and we still don't know what Rebekah's are. It had been SO LONG since her last migraine. She had an entire summer of cheering, camps, tumbling all without incident. She started out the school year wonderful. We let down our guard and when we did, they attacked her again.
So I'm here blogging about it. I am going to encourage her to write about it herself. Maybe get her to blog about her life. She has gone to a peds. neurologist. He said shes an over achiever. She is a straight A student and she loves cheer. She loves playing her guitar and her drums. She loves to sing and is a great artist. She does so much, but now I'm wondering if maybe she is doing to much. I would thing her playing guitar and drawing, painting and crafting would be a stress releaser, but maybe its more of a stressor.
If you have a child of migraines, how do you help your child cope. What are your child's triggers. I don't know what to do anymore. Last night she came to my room and she said she wanted me to cuddle with her like when she was a baby. She was feeling bad. So I did and she fell asleep in my arms like she did when she was a baby, except she is now 12.
So this is our journey right now. Helping Rebekah lead a normal teen life. Trying to help her cope with an enemy that can strike at any moment. That way she can lead a happy & full life as an adult, a wife and a mother later in life.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
I remember thinking it was going to be a long week. Marty was in his 3rd almost 4th year of military service. The night before, he had left for a field training exercise for the week. There was so much to do for me. I remember feeling sick for a while. I couldn't shake it off. I was feeling dizzy, just really out of sorts. So I had made my appointment to go to the doc the next day. I had to get things organized. Marty had left me a mess of things with all his gear he didn't have to take to the FTX. For me, it was just another day of being a military family. Little did I know that our lives were going to be turned inside out.
Sept 11, 2001:
My appointment was set to be at 9 am. I remember waking up at 7 am. We were in Rocky Mtn time so the twin towers had already been hit. I still didn't know. I got dressed, got the girls up, got them dressed. I then told them to watch tv while I made them a quick breakfast. So I turned on the tv and I heard the anchor man talk about the 93 bombings of the trade towers. I thought to myself "Why are they talking about that again?" I was so busy in my own things I didn't even stay to pay attention. I just put the channel on for the girls so they could watch cartoons.
We left the house. In Ft. Carson, we lived on post. So for me live was pretty simple. I hardly had to venture out of the post. We lived only blocks from the west gate. I remember leaving the house and the neighborhood and looking ot my right. Outside of the gate was the exit to a major highway. There was a line longer than I had ever seen. I had seen long lines and it was about 8 something and I thought "boy these people over slept". It never dawned on me that the post looked like a ghost town. I was running late and I was just glad there was no traffic for me to fight. I still had to take the girls to the day care center.
When I came up to the center, the doors were closed and I mean locked closed. I thought they had closed when all of a sudden a woman on an intercom said "What is your business here?" I said "Ugghh...My daughters have an appointment here so I can go to the doctor." she said "Please put your military ID card up close to the camera" and so i did and with that the doors unlocked and a guard guided me inside really quickly. The ladies at the reception desk were gathered around the tv and one asked me "did you have a hard time getting on post?" I said "I live on post" and I asked why. They told me some story about some guy going from daycare to daycare. Then they told me about the twin towers, but I said "Oh the bombings?" they said yeah. I didn't think anything of it cause I was still under the impression that they were talking about the 93 basement bombings.
So I am driving to the hospital, it housed all the doctors clinics as well. Normally on a regular day the parking lot was full, and you'd have to park what seamed like over a mile away. So Im dreading getting there, because "i know" will not find a good parking space. Our hospital was also the VA clinic as well, so you can imagine it being filled with a whole bunch of vets AND soldiers and families. So yeah, finding good parking spaces was a war on its own. I turn in and lowe and behold, the parking lot is almost EMPTY!! Sure I thought "What is going on?" but I also thought...WHOHOO good parking!
So I park. I walk inside. I notice that hospital is also empty, dugh right, if the parking lot is empty, so would the hospital right? I think I was slow that day, but remember I was sick. The few people at the clinic, including the medics were all crowded around the one lone tv in the lobby. I singed in and I asked "Whats going on?" the girl said "You haven't heard, they bombed the twin towers?" I said "yeah, in 1993" she said "NO...TODAY! 2 planes hit the towers!!" I was like "WHAT?!" So I walked on over to the tv and there it was footage, of the 2nd plane hitting tower one. I swear that was just as bad as someone just coming up to me and slapping me in the face for no apparent reason.
I was done with my appointment quickly and I rushed to get my babies. I knew right away that I probably would be seeing Marty for a while. He called me about noon time, our time. He said "Hun, we have been called back to the rear. I cant come home, we are on lock down. They are talking about deployment. Im just calling to tell you that I love you and If I don't see you before I leave..if I leave...please take care and pray for us." OMG I was crying. I wanted to see him, to hug him. I knew the life I signed up for and I didn't have a problem with him deploying to fight a war, but I at least wanted to SEE HIM one last time, I wanted to HOLD him, KISS him...tell him that I LOVE HIM.
2 days passed and I was watching the news almost 24/7. No word of deployment was spoken. Marty called me when he could. A few days later at night, I see my hubby coming in the back door in full "battle rattle" as they called it. I gave him a hug and it was night the girls were asleep but he went upstairs and we woke them up. The girls were so happy, they were groggy, but very happy to see daddy.
I will never forget that day. How slow I was to realize what was happening in our own country. Something that hasnt happened since the civil war...we were being attacked on our own back yard with our own stuff. I remembered my cousin who was stationed in D.C. he was sent to help clean up ground zero for a few weeks. I knew he was in D.C. and I did worry for his safety. The thought of deployment lingered in the air. Marty was attached to an infantry unit, I knew that at any moment that phone could ring in the middle of the night and he would have to go. I prayed.
I thought about those people who died in those towers, I thought about those who went in to try to find survivors, not knowing that they were walking into their own graves. I prayed for them for their souls. I asked GOD to take them up to heaven without question. I felt bad for the fatherless children. I cried for them. We had hero's here, but when those towers came down, heaven became a great shining light. We now have hero's watching over us. One this is for sure, we felt safe here in the U.S. I don't know why. We had been attacked here before, so why did we ignore the signs. We must never fall back into a sense of Serene peace. If we do, we are doomed to repeat our past. So in our sorrow, even 8 yrs later, or 10 or 50...we have to remember and always keep our guard up, but we must always remember those hero's, because that day heaven became a better place.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
Marty: What the heck?
Marty: Why are there Christmas Trees already
Me: 'cause they sell Christmas trees
Marty: Yeah but we haven't even celebrated Halloween or Thanksgiving and they already have CHRISTMAS?
Me: All the stores Ive been to are already pushing Christmas. I told you, remember, I needed to start listing Halloween stuff in late July early August.
Marty: Well forget that...start listing Valentines Day and Easter stuff instead! Its seems like people have forgotten to enjoy the season.
Me: Maybe, but I like it.
Marty: THEY ARE CRAZY!!!
You see Marty is a very intelligent man. That man only has to touch a text book and he knows the subject matter in seconds. I have a feeling he learns through osmosis. What he is not good at is retail. My poor hubby, lol. He feels all stressed out now. He feels like the retail super man is pushing him to buy early, to buy big, to just BUY BUY BUY!! So to stick it to the "man" Marty is going to 'fore go' this season of holidays. Instead he will be decorating the house in little heart lights outside the house and start putting cupids on our trees. Might as well, he says...we don't celebrate Thanksgiving anymore! *sigh* OK Marty...but your gonna miss a good juicy turkey and creamy mashed taters. You go ahead and celebrate Valentines, Ill be all warm and cozy eating my pumpkin pie and hot chocolate! Ill be thinking of you my dear...have fun!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
The huricane in Baja. Wow...it looks strong. Its a cat 5 already. People are leaving as fast as possible.
on a lighter note. I GOT SALES!!! on my artfire. Etsy has been getting a bit costly for me. I pay and pay but I didnt get sales. Artfire, I didnt have to pay to list, and i got 3 sales in one day! Thats a good thing. So Im sticking with Artfire. I will put some BIGGER items on etsy, but they will have to be special and one of a kind items. Other than that...thank you for the sales. GOD Bless!
Monday, August 31, 2009
As much as I feel like things should run smoothly, Bekah seems to take her sweet time. Its almost like having two 6 yr olds at the same time. Time is of no importance to her, or at least that's what it looks like to me. We are running around like crazies in the morning, and she walks around like time will just stand still for her. Drives me insane, I tell you. Then when we are all leaving, she is frantic looking for last minute items. *sigh* Is this the dreaded teen years at work. Is this what I'm looking to for the next 6 yrs, or until she leaves the house bound for college? Shes a good kid...just a little to lax for me LOL..drives her dad insane too! Then again, Marty is very lax as well, I guess they had to get something from him huh, I wasn't the immaculate conception here.
Well, things seem to go smoothly...shes waking up much earlier than she did last year. That's good cause she takes A LONG TIME to get ready in the morning. Some pointers for those of you who are just starting out this week.
1.) if possible have kids shower the night before. 3 of the 4 girls shower the night before. My Jesy has to shower in the morning cause she has crazy curly hair that needs to be tamed when wet!
2.) pull out clothing to be worn the next day, the night before. Making sure the kids have their shirts, pants/shorts/skirts, socks and yes even undies. I don't know how many times last year my girls would yell out in the morning "MOM I DON'T HAVE UNDERWEAR!!!" Later to find cleans ones in my room in my cabinets...how'd that get there?
3.) find ALL LOST SHOES!!! I hate looking for shoes when we should be all packing up in the truck. My girls are notorious for loosing their shoes. One is in the bathroom while the matching shoe is under the kitchen table?! No we don't have dogs...so its got to be the ghost moving the shoes around..right?
4.) make sure all school supplies, notebooks, crayons, books, HOMEWORK...is signed, checked and put away for the next day. I now ask my girls if they have any work that needs to be signed.
5.) make sure kids sleep early. Oh boy, my girls are having a hard time transitioning from summer to school days. They fall asleep late and have a hard time waking up early. So try to do this at least a week or a few days before school starts.
I hope y'all have a great new school year.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Im looking outside and I see the drops of water on my window screen. The sky is a wonderful grey. I missed that grey. I love the sun, dont get me wrong, but I think its nature that all creatures, even humans long for rain. It was the most welcoming sight, smell, feeling and sound I have heard in a LONG TIME. I let it soak me up...and my girls, laughing and splashing on the puddles left behind as we left FUD'S. I raised my arms up high, looked up to the sky and said "THANK YOU THANK YOU!"
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Seriously though this thing looks very promising. Its called the GYPSY! Its a handheld device...looks about the size of a Play Station Portable (PSP). It is touch screen. Now if you have a Cricut Machine, you can attache the cartridges to the Gypsy and it will then download the graphics of that cartridge and thats it! You can put that cartridge aside. It holds up to 7000 images. Thats cool, cause you can load a whole bunch of cartridges into this thing.
So then you can mix and match from different cartridges, manipulate the way the images look so they cut out the way you want them. Lets say you want to cut out I LOVE YOU. You can have I and Love in one font...then you go to another font and write out Love in,hmmm, lets say cursive. You then move the Love in between the I and You. Now lets say you want love to be slanted a bit. You can then touch the screen and make the love turn up or down or side to side.
There is a demo on the site. Here is the link: http://www.provocraft.com/gypsy/ just click on the link. Im not sure how much it is. There is a link that says its just over 200.00. Dont take my word for it, but I do know it will be coming out Oct of this year. Michael's is now taking pre-orders. As soon as I can i will be heading my pretty little creative mind over to Michael's and put my name on the list!
So there ya go!! My little juicy gossip on something fun and creative that can be a blast to use on the go!
Friday, August 14, 2009
So no more remodel. The family (the building belongs to his dad) hired people to deal with the remodel!
So ITS ALMOST HERE HUH??? School TIME! Im counting the days. 1 more week. Im so excited. I get to go to school too, I get time to work alone here at home. On a sad note, my beloved Luna, my cat, passed away. She was hit by a car about a month ago. It was such a heartbreaking day for Rebekah. It was her cat.
Im trying to get organized to start working on stuff too. I have to close my shop. My computer crashed and burned! I need a new one, the one dh gave me is a mini peice of crap! It will not download the drivers I need for my camera, or the Paint Shop I have to edit my photos so until I can get a new puter, I cant do A THING!!! Im getting butterflies as I think about all the things that I want to do, all the things that are happening.
Marty informed me as soon as he graduates, he will be going back to the Army. Hopefully he can get his commission. I always wanted to see my husband with officer rank! So good things are comming. I hope you guys have not left me.
Ok...gonna go find a video to show my daughter how the ovaries work. Shes courious!
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
A really talented woman posted on her blog about a question her daughter asked her, and well it scared the nilly willies out of her. So you know what I'm taking about and you can catch up with what I'm about to write visit Amelia's Blog http://ameliasfb.blogspot.com/ by clicking the link there.
OK if you read her blog, the scary word is puberty. Yup, if you have youngin's (i think for us girls are more scary than boys for some reason) yes that word will come up. A lot of us are like our parents, we hope we don't hear that word or even the S-E-X word!!! OH NO!!
Thing is this, they are going to hear it eventually. T.V. Internet and the ever so knowledgeable FRIENDS will tell them what it is all WRONG.
I decided even before I had kids that I wasn't going to be afraid of the whole puberty and sex talks. My reasoning was because I had to learn by myself. My mom and dad were scared to talk to me about these things because they had the idea that I would want to go and DO these things. Well, lets just say that ideal plan didn't work. First off, when I got my aunt flow, I was FREAKING OUT!!! I mean sure, we went to school, my mom signed the form that let the nurse show us some cartoon movie about puberty and growing up. That didn't do the job though. I still had no clue as to what to expect. See I remember when I was about 12 years old, my back was hurting so bad. So was my lower abdomen. I mean I was crying so hard, I didn't know what to do. My dad was worried, my mom was working and my little brother was biting his nails because his older sister was screaming in pain from and unknown source! Then I remember seeing it...a dark brown spot. I THOUGHT I POOPED MY PANTS!!! I FREAKED OUT. I told my dad that I had pooped my pants and I didn't know I did it. It happened again several times. I mean I was freaking out, I thought I was going crazy!!! So my dad put bengay on my back and sent me to bed. Later on around midnight my mother comes home and wakes me up. She asks me to show her what I told my dad about and she said "OH you started your period" threw me some maxi pads and that was it!!! Nothing more!
I learned other things on my own too. See when I had my oldest daughter (for those of you who don't know, I have 4 girls no boys) I swore that I was going to do things different. I had told myself that when I was about 16. I re-affirmed it again when I got married and when I had Rebekah (my oldest).
As she grew up she saw me pregnant 3 more times. I mean it was cute when she was 1 and she would pop out her belly and say "Bebe, Bebe" and point to her belly too. Then again with Rebekah and Erykah when I was pregnant with Monikah. They would pop out their bellies and say they too had babies inside them as well. I mean it was horror for my husband but I thought it was cute.
It wasn't until I was pregnant with my 4th daughter Jesykah when Rebekah asked "HOW DOES THE BABY LOOK INSIDE OF YOU?" That is when I got the book by Alexander Tsiaras From Conception to Birth . (you can click on the link to take you to Amazon).
So with this book I showed them how a baby is forming inside my belly. I went each month with them and showed them how the baby was growing and how the baby looked inside of mom. Then the question was asked "BUT MOM HOW DID THE BABY GET INSIDE YOU?"
Don't get me wrong, I did panic but then I remembered that I had a duty to do. I promised something long ago that I would never do, and that was hide. SO my daughter being a young age I tailored my answer to her age. At that time Rebekah was 6. Most of you wont have to deal with this until later on but don't wait till THEY ask...your gonna have to find a way to start this up. I recommend to start talking about this by 8 yrs old at least. So, back to the story. I told Rebekah "Well mommies and daddies love each other right?" she said "Yeah like you and daddy love each other". I proceeded to tell her that moms and dads love each other so much that the dads gives the mommy a special gift that makes the baby." That seamed to satisfy her until we moved back home.
So then, later on, while cleaning, my daughter came upon some of my stuff. She asked me what it was and I told her that mom was on her monthly flow. She asked me some questions as to why and how and what was the purpose for it. So I told her that every month a woman has this. What it was is that there was a house for a baby to move in. So the body build a house every month to wait for a baby. If a baby moved it then the flow would not happen. If there was no baby moving in then the body broke down the house and then would make another one again later on. I said the body wanted to make sure that the house was "brand new " for the new baby.
Then it progressed to (as she grew a year older) showing her what a woman looks like inside. I showed her using a book what the fallopian tubes were and what they carried. I explained to her now in better detail in some more real terms about ovulation, eggs, fallopian tubes and menstruation.
When she got to late fifth grade to early sixth grade i started talking to her about sex. She had asked. In my hometown, we have one of the highest pregnancy rates and she had already heard about sex in 4th grade except she never thought of it until she heard it again in 5th grade.
So yes, I sat down and talked to her about sex. I didn't tell her that it was a mommy and daddy loving each other anymore. She had told me what she had heard and I said it was true. I mean to her it was gross. However I told her that's how babies are made. She did freak out a bit but I told her that one day she will find a man she will love and she will not think it is gross anymore. I also did say sex was for a husband and wife ONLY. I told her sex is TO MAKE BABIES. That only moms and dads are ready to share the love for each other by creating something together that they both will share that love with. I then asked her if she thought teenagers were ready to or mature enough to take care of that baby. I said to her that unmarried people run the risk of not raising the child together because they did not plan out what the costs and sacrifice of raising a child was. A lot of the time young parents do not know the actual sacrifice it takes to take care of a child. I hate to say it but I did say that most boys are not willing to stick around so the mom is there to take care of the child herself.
All in all I did this in stages. She knows why her body hurts, she knows why she feels so tired all the time now, she knows all that. She knows her body is getting ready to start ovulating, but she also knows that she is not ready for the responsibilities of certain action. I always tell her just because you can doesn't mean you should. Remember I said that my town has the highest pregnancy rate...well my daughter just finished 6th grade. Now I know this doesn't mean anything but a lot of her friends already have boyfriends?! She tells me they kiss a lot. My daughter tell them they are too young to have boyfriends. Now Rebekah isnt the most tactful young lady ( i mean what pre-teen is?) She makes fun of them and mocks them and says "Dating, what do you mean your dating? You cant even go out without your parents? Oh wow what a date?" She is pretty grounded for her age and I'm very proud of her. She has had boys ask her to be their girlfriend and she has always said "NOPE..I'm to young for that"
So guys, don't be afraid to talk to your kids. Again do it in stages. DON'T WAIT FOR THEM TO ASK. I failed at it once. Rebekah came to me and asked me what sex was because her friends had already told her about it. I know they are our babies and they will FOREVER BE OUR BABIES even when they are 80 yrs old!!! I say that to her. Sure you don't want them to grow up but its inevitable. The best thing to do is prepare them. Make them strong, THAT GOES FOR BOYS TOO! Teach them to respect girls. Make sure your husband OR YOU DADS dont make women to look like objects. Remember one day you may have granddaughters and you want your sons to treat girls like you would want your granddaughters to be treated. My FIL learned that the hard way. He once told my husband to "GO AND SOW HIS WILD OATS" then he ended up with 4 granddaughters by me and one other granddaughter by his youngest sons ex-wife. You think he wants some guy to 'sow his wild oats' with his granddaughters? You bet he doesn't.
Don't forget that while teaching all this, teach that Love Waits too. My oldest daughter Rebekah said she wants to take the Purity vow. How that came about is a whole other post. She really respects that sanctity of marriage and I do wish my mother talked to me about these things the way I talk to Rebekah about it.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Its been very intresting and sort of difficult at the same time here. As you all know there is an economic crisis in the U.S. Yeah I know, when did that happen and how??? hahahaha, I dont see it getting any better any time soon. It does affect us though. Dh is part owner in a business. Things started to slow down here so we are doing so so. Whats bad is that I've been sick. its weird how I found out I was sick cause it wasnt some kind of virus kicking my butt and stuff. Nope actually, I started going to the gym. I mean I had felt some kind of not so well sort of feeling for a while but chalked it up to being 50lbs over weight. So I chaged my diet and got my patootie to the gym. Well at the gym, when I had my first one to one work out with the trainer, it was starting good. I was actually keeping up and I was very surprised at myself. Then out of the blue I feel fait and sick. Just that fast the entire room, my entire world was BRIGHT AS A FOOTBALL STADIUM! Im not kidding. Then the trainers voice was fading into the background and I couldnt hear him...yup I was passing out. I DIDN'T, I hate loosing control, so I fought it off. Eventually I came out of it, it took me nearly 3o minutes for me to shake it off. After that, I just felt bad almost everyday. I went to the doc and talked to him about my ordeal. so he ordered tests...A WHOLE LOT OF TESTS!! It was as if I was donating blood, yeah about 10 viles of blood!
So I go back and Im thinking my dibetes got worse. Well, actually my A1C is a 6.7 not bad. What came out is my thyroid is underactive. My metabolism is out of whack. My heartrate slows down because of my thyroid. I feel like Im on fire because of my thyroid. I get these episods that are horrible. Its all because of my thyroid. sucks really...but the worse part is not having this thing thats afflicting my metabolism. Its not haveing the insurance that can provide me the help to get my other tests done to help me treat my thyroid issue. Nope. I have nothing. The first round of tests cost me over 2800.00. That was already with a 30% discount. The actual price of it was over 4K for all my tests. Now my next round of tests are 2500 w/0 the discount and thats if they give me a discount. Not to mention that they need to give me blood work for a few months when they finaly give me my meds.
I have my good days, but I have more not so good days. With this, I can't really plan ahead. I never know if I will wake up feeling good or not. Sometimes I wake up good and then during the day, I start to feel not so good. I cant really explain it.
However with this, i have decided that Im not going to wait to feel good. Despite my health I will start again with making and selling things. So, thats whats going on with me. right now.
Oh and the girls started a new cheer company. The other one started to get a bit weird for us. They started to have favorites and they were forgetting my girls (and other girls) and stopped teaching them tumbling techniques. The new gym is a lot closer to my house, just about 5 blocks from here and the owner is really nice. She had me make the first set of cheer bows for her girls. I will be making the cheer comp bows too. So, Im glad for that. I have to look at the positive of all of this. Right...best foot forward.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
I have always wanted to learn how to create sewing patterns out of scratch. Well, I live in the boonies. They dont have classes like that here in our Community College or our University. I asked one time if they offered design in fashion and they said and I quote "We only offer classes that have value to them, not hobbies" I WAS LIKE "WHAT!!??" So New York offers only Hobby classes? Shoot, I should go tell Vera Wang her million dollar business is just a Hobby right?
Well I cant just move to New York and go to a fashion school. I have a family and my husbands job is (unfortunately) here, in this bum town. So I give it up. Well sort of. I try my best to make some patterns a bit bigger. It can be frustrated, I mean I have ruined I dont know how many yards of fabric because my measurements are wrong.
So imagine to my surprise when I go to Journal Modiste and I find an ad that has "CHILDRENS FASHION WORKSHOP!" ( just click on the name there and it will take you to the site) hey it peeked my interest. So I go and check it out. Wow I'm blown away. They have classes so you can make patterns bigger or smaller. I mean from tops to pants, to button down shirts...they have dresses and so much more. CLASSES TO HELP YOU CREATE YOUR OWN FROM YOUR OWN HEAD PATTERNS!!! I'm so stoked!
I'm so happy that someone took the time to do this. I am going to sign up for some classes. I hope it meets my expectations and of course I will come back here and let ya'll know if its worth the money. So far...I'm liking the site.
Monday, March 2, 2009
As a mother or even just as a parent, we take certain precautions to protect our children from anything that may cause them harm or even just from pain. Sometimes we cant do anything at all.
We try to teach our children hard work brings good fruits. WORK=POSITIVE. Thing is sometimes we get so caught up with teaching our kids that working hard will yield them plentiful bounty, we forget that sometimes we can work our tails off and sometimes we don't get that good "harvest"
My girls had been out of their cheer teams for over 2 or 3 months. We were moving so I had pulled them out but then the national economic security blanket was pulled away from us and we all started to feel the bitter cold of an economic down fall. So we didn't move. However because of that my girls were not able to rejoin their teams.
Well as "luck", "un-luck" for other, would have it, girls were leaving. Parents couldn't afford the tuition let alone the expense of traveling for the upcoming competition season. My girls were called up in Early January and were asked to be a part of the team again. In less than a month my girls had to learn the entire routine for the end of Jan. They did it and they did good! My oldest team received the highest ranking and the "coveted jacket" everyone strives for. However that was just a "warm up" competition. The big one is called NCA or the National Cheerleading Association Competition. That is the biggest of the biggest the Superbowl of cheerleading. Teams from all over the country came and competed there!
Again our girls did well. The my oldest team placed 3rd over all for the first day and well the youngest had some errors and hers were in 6th. Rebekahs team had a good chance. They practiced some more and "fixed" what the judges said they needed to fix, at practice. Erykahs team also did the same. Rebekah's team goes first. They are doing so well, but they did wake up so early and slept late the night before because of meetings they had to attend. They were so tired. All the moves were there, they were hitting their marks and then "OH NO" you hear me say GASP my husband goes... a team member trips and falls to her knees while they try to get her stunt up on the air. Then as my daughter is about to do her tumble pass ( a series of cartwheels and backhand springs across the floor), SHE STOPS DEAD IN HER TRACKS in the middle of one of her backhand springs! She just freezes...one of her team mates started her pass to late and they would have crashed if Rebekah continued. So she posed and blew a kiss to the judges. There were other mistakes but not as "grave" as those.
Awards near...they were in 3rd the day before..maybe they were able to hold on to that spot. They called the 12th place teams then the 11, 10 and so forth... then you here "IN 6TH PLACE WITH AN AVERAGE POINT OF" well I forgot the points they got "FROM LAREDO TX" I head that and My heart sank "TEXAS GEMS EMERALDS!" They dropped 3 spots. It was a good shot. They worked hard. They were tired all of them. Still they were able to pull it together at the end.
As I walked out I see a bunch of sobbing little girls (and one young man..yes there is a boy in the team) and lots of mothers crying with their kids. It is the hardest thing to see your child be so disappointed. Feeling like it was all their fault. You see Rebekah things that it was her fault because she stopped dead in her routine. I told her no, she prevented an accident. Still she cried and I cried.
Then it was Erykahs turn. I TOUGHT THEY DID THEIR ROUTINE PERFECTLY. I didn't see any errors but I'm no judge. Erykah stuck her moves and she did everything right. Still awards came around and out of 7 teams...they got 7th place. That was the hardest blow of them all. Sure Rebekah's team dropped 3 places but they competed with 12 teams. Erykah's team got last place. My heart broke for my girls. They had worked so hard. In less than a month they learned the routines. They practiced at home, when shopping anywhere they could they practiced.
We always teach our children "HARD WORK BRINGS GOOD REWARDS!" We forget to teach them that sometimes we can work hard and do our best but sometimes someone else beats us out. I know I'm guilty of doing that. Still, this was a time for me that life had given me. That one chance to "teach" values and morals and lessons on life, the HARD KNOCKS OF LIFE. As parents we don't want our kids to learn the HARD WAY. We want them happy. That's why we tell them not to do this not to do that. We tell them that cause WEVE DONE IT and we know the outcomes...PAIN...HEARTFELT PAIN. Yet some things are left for them to learn on their own. Sooner or later they will get their hearts broken, their spirits down, their confidence shaken. It is up to us to rise at that moment and help them stand back up. As much as it hurts us to see them in pain..we need to be there to help them back up. I told the girls there, the team not just my girls "HEY YOU GUYS DID AWESOME!!! AND WHAT DOES NOT BREAK YOU WILL MAKE YOU STRONGER!!! YOU GUYS ARE STRONGER BECAUE OF THIS AND YOU WILL DO BETTER NEXT TIME AND BE SHARPER AND BE ON SPOT "
I tried to focus on the positive aspects of the trip. They made new friends. Erykah met a team from Maryland and she was all excited. Rebekah got to spend time with her friends that go to other schools. She never gets that type of time with them. It was FUN! Sure the loss is hurtful, but I know they will bounce back and next time will be fierce.
Sometimes lessons in life are not always free of pain. We can take the advice we are given or not but we will always learn one way or another. Its harder when we see our kids learn "painfully" but we can cushion it just a bit so they can bounce back and say "I CAN DO THIS"